The Wizard Wars
March 21, 2011
The history of the jungle is mostly lost and forgotten. It’s believed that different creatures dominated the jungle through the ages. Long ago it was the Giant Ants and the Giant Women. Then it was the Dragons and Elephants. Next, the Gorillas and Men became dominant. Since the Wizard Wars ended, there hasn’t been a dominant group in the jungle. Or has there?
The historical details of the Wizard Wars (or the Pig Wars, since the native word for “wizard” is the same as for “pig”) are largely forgotten by the natives. They know it was fought between two powerful wizard kingdoms from distant continents that both wanted control of the jungle for some reason. The natives referred to the wizards as the Black and the White, after the attire and war motifs of each kingdom’s army.
The natives believed the soldiers and war machines of the warring kingdoms were controlled by The Beam, sent from the Great Pig in each kingdom’s capital faraway across the edge of the world. Some tribes allied with the army of one or the other kingdom. Other tribes adopted a brutal ritual on the belief that it would prevent them from being controlled by The Beam. This ritual involved a transorbital lobotomy, making many of them emotionless or worse.
Neither the Black Wizards or the White Wizards can claim to have won the war in the jungle. High Wizards from each side unleashed devastating magics that destroyed large swaths of jungle. After that, the war moved to some other continent. Effects of the powerful magic linger in the jungle still, in the form of cratered and deformed areas called Scarred Jungle.
In a veteran’s memoirs of the Wizard Wars:
“Our center of power was the area south of the bad bend in the Big Muddy river. We had a base in the jungle there, and also in the Tunnels of Leeches in the mountains a little further south. Well, things started to get ugly towards the end. The high command decided to abandon the jungle base and make a last stand in the mountain tunnels. Not wanting to leave anything behind for the enemy, the jungle base was destroyed, pushed all together into one big pile of trash a thousand feet high and set on fire. The war didn’t last much longer after that.
“I was one of the last to be evacuated from the mountaintop before the enemy laid it to waste, trapping many good soldiers inside the tunnels. By this time there were soldiers from both sides scattered throughout the jungle. Deserters, routed squads, and abandoned casualties. There may have been more soldiers lost in the bush, fighting to stay alive against the jungle, than there was soldiers still fighting the other side. A real shame. Some are probably still alive there. I wish I could go back and find some of my buddies. I heard a rumor that my old commanding wizard, Zougklapteryx, stayed in the jungle and went native. Built a treehouse and cooped up with a pretty girl there.”